predictive punishment

As a freelancer, I occasionally do contract IT work for friends' companies. Nepotism Personal recommendation is a powerful force in my industry. My first regular client was, in fact, a company my partner D. worked for, and although he's moved job since then, his new company has recently hired me as a contractor.

We've developed a system for dealing with the potentially messy overlap between professional and private expectations, including separate email addresses to remind us of the context in which we're communicating. But that's not to say that I don't still enjoy the kinky overtones of a power dynamic in which he is, essentially, my employer.

Last week, the day after he called me to offer me this project, I woke up cheerful and sent him a text:

Morning, boss :) *lick*

(I like calling him boss.)

He sent back what seemed to be an affectionate text-spank, and I thought nothing of it until that evening, when he commented in hurt tones that he'd been kicked that morning. I was all sympathy until it became clear that he thought he'd been kicked by me, at which point I became thoroughly confused because I hadn't even woken up with him that morning.

When was when it dawned on me. I hadn't sent him a *lick* at all. My predictive text had entered *kick* without me noticing, and I hadn't corrected it before sending. He'd replied with a warning, and now he intended to deal with it properly.

I pleaded innocence - that I'd only meant to send him a flirty hello, that it was thoroughly unfair to punish me for what was essentially a typo. But he spanked me for kicking him anyway.